On this show:

We talk about Shiina’s story from Part 1 (guys email her at shiinassexcapades[at]yahoo[dot]com)

Jersey Shore – Best show ever? Best show EVER!

Bruna picks some porn [NSFW]

Sex in the News

1) 100% of men love porn. Who knew? [via The Frisky]

2) Yep, not even Tiger can escape Bruna’s wrath. [WWTDD.com]

3) Everyone has AIDS [carnalnation.com]

4) Good Good Good, Go Vibrations. [Good Vibrations]

As always, get the show in iTunes for free by searching “messing around”

Stream it:

Or download the MP3 directly to you computer and do what you want to it.

Follow Chris on Twitter — http://twitter.com/rocketcool
Go to Facebook and search “Messing Around” to become a fan of the show.

Sorry for the delay all.  This episode was weird.  Bruna had skype problems, I tried to edit around it, but dammit, it was hard.  Also, I have a giant paper to write for school and midterms and work and a life and a ton of other bullshit.  Hopefully the next break won’t be so long.  Get in your questions.  We want them and aren’t going anywhere.

Because we had so many listener questions backed up, we did a show of just questions.  We’ll be back on schedule next time.

Enjoy!

Download it for free, as always, on iTunes by searching “messing around” in the itunes store.

Stream it:

Listener Questions:

1) Mr. Joe writes in to thank Shiina and ask about Chris’ sexual practices in the bedroom.

2) Terry got a little freaked out by some internet videos and wants to know if we’ve seem and what we think.  The internet is the fucked up Wild West, Terry.

3) Amberlina wants to lose some of her boobs.  Should we talk her off the ledge?

4) Khloey writes in to tell Shiina to send in MORE pics to the show and also to tell Bruna to get it on with her BFF.  Chris agrees on both suggestions.

5) Lauren sent some sexy pics to an exboyfriend and is now regretting it because he is a big douche nozzle.

6) Ethie also wants to talk about porn.  You guys just love porn, do you?

7) Slaveboy wants to be Bruna’s slave.

Don wants to know who would be stupid enough to cheat on Bruna.

9) Violet wants to share a good sex story.  We let her, because we’re nothing if not willing to please.

10) Peter wants Bruna to judge his cock.  Though, Bruna is very tough.  She’s like the East German judge in Pair Figure Skating.

11)  Miguel wants his wife to act like a porn star and not a falling star (his words, not mine).

Bruna’s Porn Pick of the Week:

Embarrassing Sex Stories:

Mike doesn’t like Doggy when it becomes to literal.

Libby as two:  One involving a contractor and one involving a panty sniffer.

Shiina Summer Exploits:

Shiina writes in to fill us in on her nude beach trip and included pics for Chris and demands some in return.  Shiina RULES!

That’s all for this week.  Sex in the News will return soon.  We just had a ton of Listener Questions this week.  Have a good Labor Day and enjoy some sex outside, before mother nature gets her frigid on.

As always, subscribe in iTunes by searching MESSING AROUND in the iTunes store, or via the link on the right.

Stream it:

Or just download the MP3 right to your computer.  It’s just that easy.

Follow Chris on twitter http://twitter.com/rocketcool

Follow Bruna on twitter http://twitter.com/brunis

And Search for Messing Around on Facebook and become a fan of the show.  DO IT!

On this weeks episode, Chris recounts his 4 year anniversary. Bruna talks about the cock shots she received from a listener.

Listener Questions:

1) Kaliel wants to know how to listen to old episodes of Messing Around (right now you can’t. I have to work out the storage situation. Hopefully soon. I promise.)

2) Shaunna wants dead baby jokes. Chris aims to please (when he aims, if he aims)

3) Robert thinks Bruna is hot and wants to know how to figure out the name of the girl he is dating.

4) “A” agrees that Bruna has awful taste in porn and wants Chris to pick.

5) Spunkeroo thinks Bruna is hot.

6) Cal chastises Chris for not saying “Bless You” when Bruna sneezed on the last episode.

7) Shiina write in to tell us about her summer of fun and wants some tips from us on things to do/experience.

Terry wants Bruna to move to Shitsburgh and kick him in the nuts.

9) Super Roo wants to know why we recorded in a car.

10) Violet writes in with a couple embarrassing sex stories and makes our night.

Bruna doesn’t do a porn pick this week because she is still butt hurt. She wants you guys to send them in to her and she’ll pick her favorite.

Sex in the News:

1) Ways to punish a cheater. Legal. (Via The Frisky)

2) Five body parts that guys are into that women don’t know about. (Via Glamour.com)

Thanks again for listening. Send in your questions for the next show. We love them. Also, maybe tell a friend. We’d appreciate that a bunch, too.

Also always, get it for free in iTunes by searching “Messing Around” or via the link on the right.

Stream it:

Download the mp3 directly to your computer and have your way with it.

Listener Questions

1) Emmy wants to know about girl-on-top sex and if she is doing it right? Yes, Emmy, you are. Trust me.

2) Brent wants more pics of Bruna on the site. Who doesn’t?

3) Shiina wasnts to know about my junk. I am flattered, Shiina. Flattered!

4) Mike calls Bruna out on her taste for porn

5) Dontknow opens his mouth and removes all doubt that he is a selfish asshole who has never been laid and is dressed funny by his whore of a mother.

6) Don calls Bruna out about saying that “CUM” is the correct spelling, when refering to semen or orgasms.

7) Scott shares a tale about DJing at a Swingers club. Scott also becomes my personal hero.

Bruna’s Porn Pick of the Week

Due to a lack of internet connection when recording, Bruna couldn’t pick a porn this week, but challenged all of you to send her a link to your favorite porn (must be free, she ain’t paying… so use a site like pornhub.com or uporn.com or whatever.) She’ll pick some and talk about it on the next show. brunaATmessingaroundblog.com

Sex in the News

1) Girls developing boob earlier? Yuck! [via The Frisky]

2) Red wine makes the ladies horny. Jackpot!. [via the Frisky]

And that’s it.  Thanks for listening and maybe leave a review on iTunes and/or tell friend? That’d be super.  Also, get your questions in for the next show and your porn picks for Bruna.

As always, subscribe to the show for free in iTunes via the link on the right or by searching for Messing Around in the iTunes store.

Stream it:

Or just download the MP3 to your hard drive and make it your bitch.

Listener Questions:

1) Cherise wants to know if Bruna is related to a certain annoying family.

2) Dude interviews Bruna on everything from rimming to Iraq.

3) Creepy Jack is apparently an animal and a wordsmith (but not a Will Smith.)

4) Mr. Joe teases us and leaves us with a case of blue balls.  Thanks a load, Mr. Joe.

5) Prentice wants to know about titty lovin’ (which is a word we don’t use while the green lamp is turned on.)

6) Mr. Cocksman has a question about the average lengh of love making.

Listener Poll:

Kim K vs. J-Lo

Bruna’s Porn Pick of the Week:

Swinger Sex Vacation

Sex in the News:

1) Hyenas?  The new Cougars?  Whaaaaaaa? (thefrisky.com)

2)  Premature ejaculators get a little spray on love. (The Frisky)

3) Merkin – tile vagina flashlight?  Crazy business. (The Frisky)

All this and more.  Find us in Facebook (link on the left) or on twitter.com/rocketcool its what we do.  Thanks again.

Get it for FREE in iTunes (by searching Messing Around or the link on the left)

Stream it:

Listener Questions:

1) Joe is in a regular threesome and wants to know how far he should go.  I say: To infinity and beyond!

2) Keith’s wife won’t swallow.  She also won’t dove or blue jay.

3) Jim’s wife seemed to pick up some new tricks illusions (tricks are what whores do for money.)

4) Heart of Texas wants to know what turns Bruna’s crank.

Poll Question:

Who would you rather fuck:  Chris Brown or Bobby Brown?

Bruna’s Porn Pick of the Week (NSFW)

Sex in the News:

1) Cheaters and the revenge that has been wrought upon them. (Link from College Candy)

As always, Subscribe for free in iTunes (via the link on the right)

Stream it:

Or just download the MP3 right to your computer and have your way with it.

Thanks for listening and submit your questions for the next show NOW!  Do it, you know you want to.

So let us get right to it, shall we?

Listener Questions:

1) Nipple Piercings – Are they the new black?

2) Boyfriend has an ex for a friend – Trouble in Paradise?

3) Is the way Bruna and I speek to each other untoward? Is Bruna even her real name?

4) How does Chris get it started? Is he a pull start?

5) How to elegantly ask for a little knock at the back door.

6) We get our ego’s stroked a little (Our Ids and Superegos become very jealous.)

7) ATM vs VTM and more ass questions (you guys/girls sure love asking about the ass)

Married and Sexless – Life is never as funny as Everybody Loves Raymond.

9) Bill WANTS to “Get Fucked”

Bruna’s Porn Pick of the Week:

Orgy in the Theater NSFW (Ed. Note: What the fuck Bruna? Really? I mean REALLY?)

Who Would You Rather Fuck?

Scarlett Johansson vs Natalie Portman

Sex in the News:

1)OctoMom – NO!!!!!!!!!!!!  Fuck her, I mean really.  Goddamn her eyes!

2) Dad at 13 – This is seriously disturbing. You have been warned. [Link]

All this and MUCH MUCH SO MUCH MORE!  Submit a queston for the next show and add us in Facebook and Twitter

As always, subscribe in iTunes via the link to the right.

Stream it:

OR

Just download the MP3 to your computer and do with it what you want.

Thanks for listening.  Maybe tell a friend or write a review in iTunes.

[Join us. You have been known to disagree with the Council before. Yours could become an important voice in the new order, second only to my own! I offer you a chance for greatness, Jor-El! Take it! Join us!… You *will* bow down before me, Jor-El. I swear it! No matter that it takes an eternity, you *will* bow down before me! Both you, and then one day, your heirs! (Ok, I am seriously done with the Superman stuff now.)]

(Richard Pryor.)

Sure, I get excitement from trying new things, but those things don’t involve the possibility of putting my penis in a new vagina.  They are more centered around me getting to try this new shampoo that might make my hair thicker… so I got that going for me.

But I do totally remember what it was like to go out and learn new things about a semi/complete stranger and do the uncomfortable “get to know you” dance that is hopefully merely a prelude for the “no pants” dance.  Good times.  Really good, in fact.  Trying to get a date with someone always fucking sucks, but once you get the date and things are a go, that is the best.  It is so fully of possibilities.

Will my new girl/boy friend be the one?
Will they be crazy?
Will tonight end with one of us trying to make bail?
Will I get to fuck him/her tonight?
Will this person turn into a teenaged wolf if I they get to angry?

So many questions.  It can been a little nerve wracking, I know.  So I culled together some tips that I have learned from past relations or from friends and came up with a few things you should know when starting a new relationship.

Sexual Partners:  It’s totally cool to lie.  In fact, it would be better for all parties involved.  Ladies, when this comes up and he is looking for numbers, just say four.  You’ve slept with four guys (unless your a virgin, then email me and I’ll help you out with that little problem.)  Four is a great number.  It shows that your not afraid to fuck, but that your not a total whore.  Guys, your number is seven.  Guys are expected to sick their dicks in anything and everything.  This shows that you’ve done your fair share of fucking, but that you aren’t just a player.  This also applies if you’re a virgin, just say seven.

Friends:  Don’t rush to introduce your new fling to all your friends.  After a month or two, sure, go ahead, but make sure this is someone who is going to be around for a while so that they don’t all have to pretend to like every person you end up dating.  Personally, I hate meeting new people, especially new boyfriends/girlfriends because I am afraid I am going to say something dumb/gross/perverted.  I don’t want something that I am likely to say to cause him/her to bolt. Once you get serious, by all means, bring them around, just make sure to provide the proper warnings to both camps.  Example:  “Listen babe, my friend Chris is probably going to make an “Anal Joke” before the night is over.  Just don’t be shocked,”  or “Dude, could you please not make any “Anal Jokes” before the entree is served.  Look, I’m not asking for the world here, just not before the entree.”

Also, if you’re bringing your new love of your life out with a big group of your friends, don’t spend the entire night with your tongue in his/her mouth.  We get it.  You’re enamored and can’t keep your hands off each other.  I just don’t want to looking for that lost kernel of popcorn I dropped in the theater and see you finger-banging your date.  Please?  Thank you.

Paying Your Share:  I’ll make this easy.  Guys, pay for everything. Just do it.  Don’t order for her, pull out her chair, open the door, give her your coat and just pay for everything.  She might let you fuck her later, consider it an investment.  Just watch out for gold-diggers, especially if you are a broke broke.

Secrets/Drama:  Don’t reveal your life story one in the first five dates.  Tell only good stories or “bad, but funny now” stories.  DON’T talk about your moms “friend” that you had to call Uncle Bill who would always make you sit on his lap. DO, feel free to tell the story about how you broke your arm skydiving.  DON’T talk about the month you spent in a group home.  DO talk about your love of Growing Pains.  Also, when you start fucking, don’t lay all your kinks on the table and tell them how you only like to be fucked in a tub full of mayonnaise while the dog is in the room and you have your mom on speakerphone.  You got to ease a person into shit like that.  Remember, if things are seem good, you have your entire life to tell that person your kinks, quirks and past.  Why?  Because if things don’t work out, they are going to have some fucked up things to write next to those naked pics you just had to take.

Above all else, have fun getting to know the other person.  The hard part is over, you already have the date.  Now you just have the simple task of deciding if this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Listener Questions:

1) 3-5in, problem or magic trick?

2) Semen in the eye, Does it sting or does it Gordon Sumner?

Bruna’s Porn Pick of the Week (NSFW)

Our Top Five Breakup Songs

Bruna

Goodbye – Jagged Edge

Bye Bye Bye – N’Sync

I Hate Everything About You – REM

So Much for My Happy Ending – Avril Lavigne

Burn – Usher

Chris

Mess/Give Judy My Notice – Ben Folds (Five)

Don’t Think Twice, It’s Alright – Bob Dylan

Needle In the Hay – Elliot Smith

Red Right Hand – Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds

This Ones Not About You – Johnathan Coulton

Runner up: Big Rock Candy Mountain – Traditional (I dare you to listen to this and not feel awesome)

This Weeks “Who Would You Rather Fuck” competition.  Angelina Jolie vs. Megan Fox

Sex in the News:

1) Cheesecake Factory Ball Surprise (AzCentral)

2) Sexy Christmas Gifts (TheDailyBedpost.com)

Submit your questions, leave your comments and answer the poll.  Thanks for listening.

As always, subscribe to the show for free in iTunes via the link on the right.